5am lobby stillness vs the refusals that sit there

Sunday morning at the front desk and the quiet has that reverent 5am quality again, but underneath it I can feel every request I turned down this week stacked like unread mail. I keep thinking about the ones I refused — not the ridiculous ones, the ones I could've said yes to if I wasn't so tired. Old shoes worn smooth always fit better than new ones, and I suspect so do old grudges.